I was a tad disappointed with this episode of American Gladiators. It just didn’t have enough “fang tough” or “welcome to the gun show.” However, without fail, they still provided enough lines to make me scream WTF?@%#^ at least 3 times. And here they are if you missed it:
Let’s meet our first contender (I don’t like this word): Minister Andy. After the original contender (Nope, still doesn’t work for me) was injured by Mayhem in the first game, Minister Andy replaced him. (Ok, so this is the second injured contestant in 4 episodes. Maybe they’re a little rough, no? I mean, if you break someone’s ankle in 10 seconds, maybe you should avoid humans. Also, does anyone else realize that Mayhem looks like an old lesbian. (Not that there’s anything wrong with that.) No, no? Was I the only one that noticed that. Alright, alright, I’m heading back to the topic…now.)
In his interview tape, Minister Andy- who is pretty built (was that wack?)- informs us that his friends make fun of his work out habits and calls him the following names:
- The preacher of pain
- The reverend of rip
Ohhhhh noooo! Keeping that to himself would’ve been ok. I didn’t need to know. Did you? I have no idea how this next line came about, but Andy adds, “I’m all about the Hebrew Hammer.” The contender (Suggestions for another word please) he replaces is seen later wearing a Hebrew Hammer shirt. (Is he the Hebrew Hammer? Who is the Hebrew Hammer?)
(UPDATE: It’s just come to my attention – I googled it – that the Hebrew Hammer is a movie about a Jewish superhero. Hmmmm)
Hogan, who REFUSES to by outdone, says to Minister Andy before the Joust:
- “Looking to baptize you is the awesome Titan.” Hmm..REALLY?
Then Hogan rambles off this little number after Sharaud defeats Titan:
- “You are the man of the hour. You are the man with the power. YOU’RE THE MAN TOO SWEET TO BE SOUR.”
And that folks is where I go to sleep.
Whitney, did you catch anything? I have a couple more, but I have to sleep that one off.
Mayhem, old lesbian?
6 Comments
A) I agree that Mayhem really does look like an old lesbian. Although, I see a little bit of a cracked out Busta Rhymes as well…
B) The entire time I was watching it, anytime a contestant (is that better?) fell or got hurt I kept screaming out, “Pimp down! Pimp down!” I blame this on Katt Williams.
C) There just always has to be a C.
D) I was so blown away by the “too sweet to be sour” comment that my mind went on mental lockdown and wouldn’t let me process anything else.
So here is my story,
I get home from work around 6:30, go to the post office, came home and cleaned and ALL OF THIS was done in preperation to give American Gladiators my undivided attention. I finish it all just in the nick of time only to turn on the TV and see…NOTHING! My cable was messed up and i was PISSED!
So then i scurry to call everyone in close enough proximity but only to find out there is simply no chance of me watching Am. Glad. (American Gladiators).
With great friends like Clev though, you won’t miss anything. I was given the live update via text which STILL kept me entertained.
This will not happen again next week.
Wait, Mayhem is NOT an old lesbian? Since when? Get outta town…
Did i miss anything though? If not then im going to go out on a limb (again) and say this weeks episode was a disappointment…no?
One of the female contestants was a bullrider. I’m going to paraphrase this. She said:
I’m going to put my head down and run through her with my horns. (But you’re not a bull?)
She isn’t?
Is she?
She is?