Bill Cosby to Embarrass Self With New Rap Album

That was nymag.com’s headline. I mean, they gave him NO CHANCE. None. They basically said, “Bill, eff off.”

But it is true. As unfortunate and comical as it is, Bill is coming out with a rap album. Now, I understand his purpose, but when you’re Bill Cosby, what exactly do you rap about- pudding pops, Jello. I mean is that hot? I doubt it? He’s clearly not going to make it rain on anybody. Therefore, no one will listen.

It’s safe to say that MC Hammer shouldn’t be involved in anything related to technology and Bill Cosby shouldn’t be a rapper. Pretty safe to say, ’cause I’m saying it. Hmmmm, I wouldn’t encourage MC Hammer to start rapping again.

Actually, I can’t wait to hear this album. (That last statement was a complete lie.)

However, this picture is hilarious? Yes, yes it is.

31_billcosby_lgl.jpeg
Photo Illustration: Everett Bogue; Photos: Getty Images

After seeing these images a few (brilliant) possibilities came to mind.

1) Imagine walking into your favorite most popular night club and hearing the emcee introduce the special surprise guest artist for the night and when they hit the lights THAT (above pic) is what you see…how PISSED would you be?

2) We at Absohilare have reason to believe his album will be titled, “Start with Jello Shots and then Eat Pudding”. I would buy it. I just lied.

20 Comments

  • 1
    Ada
    February 11, 2008 - 5:41 pm | Permalink

    I’m still in denial/shock. WTF was he thinking, and even more so, how much money did he have to pay his label to sign him? And WHO would sign him?! This is all so strange. God really is coming…This is a sign if anything else.

    We should all just go to the confessional right now, repent our bad ways, and hide under our beds until Christ descends (on the day of Bill Cosby’s album release) and casts us all into Hell…

    Shaking my head…

  • 2
    February 11, 2008 - 7:12 pm | Permalink

    Could it be worse than William Shatner’s Rocketman rendition (1978).

  • 3
    V. Clev
    February 11, 2008 - 7:42 pm | Permalink

    LMAO. That is hilare.

    You never want Bill Cosby starting a rap career to signal the end of the world as we know it.

    Random convo:

    Person A: The world is coming to an end.

    Person B: How do you know? The tsunamis, hurricanes, random changes in weather, apple bottom jeans with the fur…FUR

    Person A: NO WAY. Bill Cosby is a rapper.

  • 4
    V. Clev
    February 11, 2008 - 7:47 pm | Permalink

    Can someone please tell me why I listened to that William shat?

    I liked it. (Yup, you’re catching on. That was a lie.)

  • 5
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 9:16 am | Permalink

    Ada,

    If you heard that God was coming the first thing you would do is HIDE UNDER YOUR BED? (abso ridic) You do realize we are talking about the coming of Christ and not hurricane correct? Also, you do realize that there is no HIDING possible, it’s JC we’re talking about here, i’m sure he will find you, especially in such an elementary hide & go seek spot like the good ol’ “under the bed”. Sure bet to lose.

    Robert,

    If you think that is a good rendition you should try getting your hands on the one Stewie did on Family Guy a few seasons ago, hilarious. (tried to find it but the original clip has been removed everywhere? yes, they removed it all over)

  • 6
    V. Clev
    February 12, 2008 - 12:19 pm | Permalink

    I completely missed the brilliant idea to HIDE UNDER THE BED. What were you thinking Ada? Smh…

  • 7
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 12:34 pm | Permalink

    As in SERIOUSLY!

    Imagine that…(cue scene)

    Musin: OH crap, God is coming! What is we gon’ do?
    Ada: Quick, Over here! Lets hide under this here BED!
    Musin: eff you.

  • 8
    V. Clev
    February 12, 2008 - 12:40 pm | Permalink

    LMAO.

    The bed idea could be a good idea though. (Lie.)

  • 9
    February 12, 2008 - 12:47 pm | Permalink

    I actually saw the Stewie version before the Shatner version. I always wondered who Seth Mcfarlane was making fun of.

  • 10
    February 12, 2008 - 1:47 pm | Permalink

    I will stand in line to buy this album. And then once I get to my car, I will turn up the volume as loud as possible and do the Sprinkler dance to it.

    BOOYAH.

  • 11
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 2:03 pm | Permalink

    Yea,

    You better be careful with such a HOT item you might have people out to steal it from you.

    Imagine, you get to your car, pump up the volume, the bust the BOOYAH dance then KABOOM! In comes the Ninja-Bread Man to take all your sh*t. Word on the street is he’s a huge Cosby fan.

    Watch your back Whit…

  • 12
    February 12, 2008 - 2:09 pm | Permalink

    Are you unaware of the Ninjabread Man’s true identity???

    I am safe.

  • 13
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 2:14 pm | Permalink

    Err…umm…eeem…..who is the Ninjabread Man?

    (I don’t think I want to know. Fib)

  • 14
    V. Clev
    February 12, 2008 - 2:41 pm | Permalink

    Have you seen the sprinkler dance yet Musin? It’s hilare. The very thought of whit doing said sprinkler dance to Bill Cosby’s new rap release makes me want to hide under my BED.

  • 15
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 3:49 pm | Permalink

    (Haven’t seen it, I would like to)

    But why would you hide under your BED?

    You must have received word of the soon coming rapture…

  • 16
    Streetz: The Living Legend
    February 12, 2008 - 4:40 pm | Permalink

    LMAO!!!! wow… i hope this is a lie

  • 17
    A. Musin
    February 12, 2008 - 4:57 pm | Permalink

    No sir,

    100% Fact.

    You better find a bed to hide under…L M A O !

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