(Picks up microphone at podium)
Firstly,
I can’t STAND office meetings. I don’t know what it is but as soon as I even peer into the conference room it’s almost as if I become locked in a choke hold of sleep! I can hang for about a good 15-20 minutes without dozing but after that all bets are OFF!
This time however I got caught off guard with a serious double whammy. Not only was I trying to loosen the grip of the sandman but I was also being subjected (repeatedly) to the most annoying, overused, thoughtless phrase known to man. I wanted to rip my ears off, then, paste them over my eyes as to not hear or see anything else related this corpulent pile of bore.
Blah blah blah blah blah and “Things of that nature.”
BOO! I mean, once here and there i can’t get mad at that. (Even though I will because I hate it.) But this man was blatantly abusing this cop out phrase. It’s clearly a phrase for people who lacking in vocabulary stature or are simply fluffing the majority of their sentence. Evil people they are, evil. This man wasn’t even using it as a life boat, he just LOVED using it. Imagine every other sentence ending in things of that nature.
Imagine if I was to tell you about boring things you would be uninterested, disappointed, pissed and things of that nature. When you read AbsoHilare you enjoy yourself, laugh, tell your friends and things of that nature. PYO (Pissin’ You Off) yet? It’s definitely PMO! If it isn’t lets continue…So during the week most adults go to work, go to after work events, watch TV/Movies and things of that nature. On the weekends these folks usually use the extra time to hang out late, shop plenty, hang out late and things of that nature. PMO!
I can’t even put myself through the pain of typing this anymore. It’s either you learn some more damn words or wrap the sh*t up. You can use a period you know. What usually pisses me off is when it is used the sentence was already over! 99.9% of the time its used for no reason, only to piss me off apparently. Either learn some more synonymous terminologies or end the friggin sentence.
(Puts down the microphone and walks off stage with both hands in the air. No reason for hands in the air to be honest just for show, adds effect. Respect my hands in the air.)
11 Comments
I frequently come across professors who use statements “of that nature” and you know what? It pisses me off! Quite frankly I think it is UNACCEPTABLE for men and women in HIGHER EDUCATION to use those words. Not to mention that man in your meeting. I’m going to assume that he holds some kind of important position since he was given the task of pissin you off and you know what, he deserves to be STONED, FIRED, things of that effing nature…bet he can’t even read!
well for st. patrick’s day (next holiday) you can give him a dictionary/thesaurus combo with glitter sprinkles in the bag… no purpose for the sprinkles, just effect.
also, NOTHING is as bad my Psych professor who says and stuff not just at the end of every sentence, but before them and in the middle of them as well …
I mean lady, what the hell did you write in your dissertation?
ex: Schizophrenia and stuff is a life long disease and stuff that really needs a holistic approach and stuff.
That coupled with the fact that she sits there and has a lil personal fan on the desk blowing her way and that damned rolly bookbag … really GRINDS MY GEARS
point is: I feel your pain man!
(can i drop the mic and walk away arms up?)
1) Bring back stoning. People would really cut back on plenty of the foolishness they do now a days like murder, theft, arson and things of that nature (ouch! Hurts to even joke about it.)
2) Danielle is clearly vying for the “Abosholare Gift-Giver” title. Seems like you have a gift to give allll the time ehh? Lol. First Presidents Day, Now St.Patrick’s Day? Ridic.
-A ROLLY-BAG?! LOL! How old is she? More importantly…can she walk? The only reason I will say it’s acceptable for her to use a Rolly-Bag is if she is paralyzed.
-On the mic dropping…ehh…give it a try and see how it works out for you. It’s not for everyone though, its kinda like the moonwalk, not everyone can do it and make it work for them.
*Stands from the audience and pumps fist in the air while doing the Arsenio… Looks around, sees no one else is applauding and sloooowly sits back down…
Lolll.
* Walks back on stage…does the BOOYAH dance…crowd erupts in a frenzy, does the cool point at Whit–hands thrown back in the air…and I’m OUT!…
In some Middle Eastern/Arabic countries, the part of your body that you used to cause your offense is cut off. I recommend that you do as the Middle Easterners and Arabs do and cut out his tongue…
Ada, put down the cleaver and pick up a stone! Try stoning someone and tell me how it feels. I’d go with magnificent, exhilarating, things of that nature. Note though, its not the actual throwing of the stone that brings satisfaction, its seeing it CONNECT with (preferrably the head of) the person you are aiming at!
Brownie, while I understand that there is a certain satisfaction gained by releasing your anger in thrust after thrust, hearing him scream would be annoying. I’d rather cut out the tongue and have the satisfaction of watching him gag because he has some shit to say, get depressed when he realized that he couldn’t speak (and that all pen and paper had mysteriously disappeared), and things of that nature…
Hmm,
Did you folks have these little things called ‘toys’ growing up?
Of course I did, I played with stones?
Oh my LORD! My professor used “And things of that nature” casually the other day in discussing what Hitler did to the Jews. WHO does that? Very disrespectful, and oh so annoying!