Aw shite! I am back, and its sure feels good to be home. My sincerest of apologies as life has a weird way of throwing a curve-ball when you least expect it. Anywho, tough people outlast tough times…now, onto the hilarity.
Imagine blank dark screen with old-school newspaper spiraling from the depths of the dark screen only to land smack in the middle of your screen reading: “The 7 train strikes again!” This time with no delay, as SOON as I get on the train I peer to my right to see a whole heap of empty space. Wierd. (Usually the after work rush leaves me doing somewhat of a skateboard like balancing act in the middle of the train due to lack of seating.)
Empty seat? No takers? Sure i’m in! I go to towards the seat and see yet ANOTHER cracky on the 7 train. This one was a lone ranger though. So I take a closer look and to my surprise I see cracky READING a newspaper. I was highly impressed; for about a total of 9.1 seconds. That sentiment quickly evaporated as soon as he hurriedly put his newspaper away and randomly came out came a Pint of ICE! ICE!!
Folks, where the fu*k do you randomly get ice from when you are homeless? I think it’s safe to say it would be very difficult to pull that off. So to make this even more HILARIOUS , as he is ravenously consuming these huge chunks of ice (as if it was the most delicious sorbet) he decides to scream, “A muthafucka needs to bring me some gat damn waaater”. WHAT Cracky McGee!? YOU ARE EATING ICE, and you want water?! I swear to you I had to hide my laugh by masking my face with my sleeve (as to preserve my LIFE). How are you thirsty when you are eating water? Even worse, just wait damnit! You have water, stop begging (I can tell a bum to not beg? really Musin?) people for stupid shit. Use your begs wisely.
Cracky Mac then went on to (before the conductor) announce every upcoming stop like he was opening a baseball game. So as I get off (lmao) I was about to turn back on my headphones to continue my commute but I KNEW he had one more in him. So said, so done…”74th Street and GAT DAMN Broadway Bitches..and God Bless America”… I almost LOST IT. I’m still laughing as I re-type these events. And I KNOW some one will have doubts but this is pure fact. As a matter of fact, I have PICTURES to prove it this time!! IM BACK!! (Hit the links for a better look)