Things That Piss Me Off Pt. 1
The other day I skipped to my neighborhood grocer (LIE, but imagine if I really did SKIP all the way from my door, to the elevator, out the elevator to the streets ALL the way to the market, WILD.) In any event, I literally ran in for…damn…I don’t remember, eff. Anyway, it’s not possible that it was more than 5 items.
I walked around the store, picked up my shat (whatever these items were) and firmly planted myself in the express lane.
OK great, I think to myself. Only two people in front of me. I should be out of here in less than no time.
But, no no no (like Destiny’s Child? Boo? *scurries off.) Why is it that the express lines always takes the longest. I’ll tell you why, it’s because of jackasses like these:
Guy at the checkout: This guy is at the checkout with 30 bags of ice and 10 styrofoam cups. 30 BAGS OF ICE. Why would you ever need that much ice and so few cups? This actually wasn’t all his fault. This hold up was caused because the cashier, for 5 solid minutes, contemplated how she was going to ring each bag up seperately. PMO.
Guy directly in front of me: So after the ice fiasco is complete, I think once again, great. This guy in front of me only has 12 eggs, 1 dozen, 1 measly carton of eggs. This HAS to be quick.
Carton whizzes by on the conveyor belt. $2.99 flashes on the screen. Cashier asks for payment. Then this man does the UNTHINKABLE, he…he…he…whips out a checkbook. OH NO SIR. OH NO. Are you really planning on writing a check for these $2.99 eggs. PMTFO. And why…why why why, didn’t you start filling this out as we were waiting on the ice moron.
First of all .. this was ABSO HILARE (no pun intended put punt if you like) this happens to be all the time. Who are these CHECK WRITERS dont they know ..its all electronic and the check will go through right away not 5 days like before while people scurry to put in money.. the exact same day! so why not use the debit card! Just DO IT!
Comment made by Jolie Fatale on July 28, 2008 @ 12:03 pm
Anyone using cheques in the grocery store should be sentenced to a year of fighting red-nosed pits at the Bad Newz Kennel in VA. Literally, going toe-to-paw with the dogs themselves.
Comment made by Al Sharpie on July 28, 2008 @ 12:11 pm
Seriously, who are these people?
Do they forget their checkbook at home and run back for it?
Comment made by V. Clev on July 28, 2008 @ 12:19 pm
what are checks? i think thats before my time.
Comment made by FeFe Fatale on July 28, 2008 @ 12:45 pm
Firstly,
Al Sharpie…solid user name my friend, welcome!
But why did this post take me back to the Visa commercial with the people dancing as they swiped their cards? I (immediately) envisioned Clev doing the robot all the way to the front of the line and then stopping abruptly when the check book made it’s way into her line of vision.
Please confirm.
Comment made by A. Musin on July 28, 2008 @ 1:27 pm
Fefe,
It’s what Nike uses on their products, Boo?
Comment made by A. Musin on July 28, 2008 @ 1:28 pm
Boo and BOO Musin. Where should I begin?
I was abso not doing the robot, unless this routine consisted of me balling up my fist and punching him in the face.
That Nike line was wildly wack.
Comment made by V. Clev on July 28, 2008 @ 1:30 pm
Oh Clev,
My apologies. Now, seriously, about the check, it’s what you do to yourself before you wreck yourself…(boo?)
*ducks.
Comment made by A. Musin on July 28, 2008 @ 1:31 pm
*puke
YOU are PMTFO Musin.
Cut it out (like Michelle on Full House. Boo?)
Comment made by V. Clev on July 28, 2008 @ 1:34 pm
i saw someone use a check b4 and almost stoned them. ON SITE!!!
That ish pisses me off… I dont eff with xpress lines anymore. I observe, assess, and execute. Go to the line which the products are moving fastest and then make it happen!
Damn Mr Musin… Def a LOSS
Ricky Loss at that…. check streetztalk to see ROBOBOSS’s latest LOSS
Comment made by Streetz: The Living Legend on July 28, 2008 @ 1:47 pm
I was once behind a lady who spent about three of the longest minutes of my life digging around her purse in order to write a cheque for one of those 99 cent packs of candy. Now that PMTFO. I def could not be a cashier, because I’d get fired for screaming at half of the idiots that come into my line.
Comment made by Ada on July 28, 2008 @ 7:58 pm
Guys, believe me, I understand that the check is wild, but did you all completely forget about the 30 BAGS OF ICE. Maybe it’s because I saw this. The man had TWO SHOPPING CARTS OF ICE.
Geez people.
Oh and Jolie - solid RBT there. Almost slipped by me.
Comment made by V. Clev on July 28, 2008 @ 9:05 pm
That 10 cups/30 bags of ice man is clearly an alcoholic and is going home to meet up with nine other friends to consume mass amounts of steaming hot liquor…nothing else makes sense to me…
I thought maybe it was a party but they were missing some cups, but really now…if you need thirty bags of ice, and you were short some cups you would NOT just go out and get an extra 10.
What I’m saying is I don’t understand why..I don’t.
[end rant.]
P.S. that was one sly RBT there…good eye Clev, good eye.
Comment made by A. Musin on July 29, 2008 @ 9:29 am
HA
Comment made by Splakattack on July 29, 2008 @ 4:24 pm